Quantcast
Channel: phoenix – HotstickyBun
Viewing all articles
Browse latest Browse all 11

Golf Ball Whacker

$
0
0

Day 2 is officially in the books, yeah I’m still up but it’s become more and more apparent from the two other hefty fellows who joined me that they can’t/aren’t used to the heat down here as they continue to ever so gently fall asleep before midnight. Not that I’m complaining, after the punishment they took on the golf course today I don’t blame they one bit for being tired, there was a point this afternoon where I thought Stilly may just take his anger out on some unsuspecting house…or even worse, an unsuspecting beer girl. Ironically enough it was that unsuspecting and unattending beer girl who had most of our frustration all day. When a crew of alcoholics only get one visit from the beer cart girl it makes for a very unfulfilled day.

The Morning

Hard to believe that this morning was really only our second morning on the trip. Wednesday we spent a lot of time at the pool working on our Italian and creep staring before getting sun burnt and catching up on the Don Cherry story entitled Keep Your Head Up Son. Today was really our first attempt of actually doing some physical activity. We crashed early Wednesday night and awoke late Thursday morning, there were rumours that we were in for Thunderstorms and heavy wind but those turned out to be false. That in turn brought some great news as we awoke and eventually cracked some beers in anticipation of a great day.

Little did the other two know just what it is they were in store for.

If there is one thing I’ve learnt golfing over the years it’s how much a persons game can change when you’re faced with different elements. In Alberta we’re dealt with trees, water, and on most days wind, where as down south it’s ridiculous rough that doesn’t allow you to find a ball, heavy sun, and of course sand, sand, sand, and more sand. While I don’t claim to be a pro by any means I am a seasoned veteran when it came to golfing Trilogy so regardless of what happens with my game I’m usually just happy to get through it with only losing a couple of balls. I’m quite sure Stilly was ready to kill somebody or at the very least walk down into a wash and find a rattlesnake to step on.

Beer Cart Broadjourno

With most men (maybe women I dunno) when you’re having a bad game you can always fall back on hope that despite shanking it into the tulies you see the beer cart girl on the next hole and realize that there’s more important things then finding that ball, like buying 6 beer so you can forget about your score and more importantly what it is you’re doing to suck so much ass at golf. Today that never happened.

We can take solace that she was extremely hot but when men only get one round of drinks in an 18 hole golf game it’s safe to assume that you suck at your jobjourno. If there is one thing that balances out a bad golf game it’s enjoying 18-20 barley pops to numb the pain.

Gieco Tried To Sel Us Insurance

The Gieco Gecko Sold Us Insurance

Mallory

It’s one thing not to have beers but to have that son of a bitch Geico Gecko throw us a sales bitch on the seventh hole is another. We get it, your insurance rates are superb and it’s so easy a caveman can do it. But we’re Canadians and I think cavemen are ugly.

So That’s It

Pretty uneventful day. I wish I wasn’t here typing this but I can’t sleep because my face and legs are sunburnt and it stings a little. The good news about today is we can finally go and pick up another flat each at Safeway tomorrow because we’ve managed to drink 60 beer already. If there is one thing we all will take away from this trip it’s going to be an extra 20lbs. It’s one thing to drink beer all day every day, its another entirely to have turkey for dinner only to be pounding nachos, cheese, and ground beef 3 hours later…WITH BEER.

Anyways tomorrow is Friday, it’s supposed to be in the mid 80′s, which should mean more sunburns and plenty more beer to be drank. Till tomorrowderci.

Oh yeah before I forget be sure to enjoy the latest video I added, it should be a good intro to a site we talked about last summer called Whack Fuck Golf.

The post Golf Ball Whacker appeared first on HotstickyBun.


Viewing all articles
Browse latest Browse all 11

Trending Articles